Sunday, April 11, 2010

Step 2290: Don't give a stool sample about Tiger Woods affair

Sports guy is an accurate characteristic of who I am.  Outside of the judging sports, I am pretty well versed in the ongoing shenanigans of the sports world (obviously I don't follow the odd/niche sports like cricket, Aussie rules football, or women's basketball).  There's one issue that has been dominating the sports landscape the last couple of weeks/months and that's Tiger Woods and his affair.

I couldn't care less about Tiger's steamy adulterous life and how it's affecting his relationship with his hot *bork* Swedish *bork* wife.  Some might find that weird when the conversation is brought up.  "But Jimmy, you are a sports guy, you should have opinion…right?"

No, I don't.  Not at all.  It's because I'm a sports guy and not a TMZ guy.  I have never watched Tiger on the golf course and once thought:  "Gee…that back swing has been little inconsistent.  Tiger must be having an off day or maybe he's having a domestic dispute because of some ill conceived sexual conquests."  I watched Tiger and was a fan of Tiger because of how good he was on the golf course and I will continue watching because of that.  I practice a little act called "compartmentalizing."  Guys are great at it, and I am especially good at it.

I especially didn't like the Augusta National chairman, Billy Payne, chastising Tiger Woods before the event started.  Mr. Payne, you should be sending a personalized green jacket to Tiger just for showing up and bringing the extra couple of thousand attendees and hordes of media attention.  He also tried to allude to Tiger failing as a role model; "disappointed all of us, and more importantly, our kids and our grandkids.”  Guess what Gramps, Tiger is not your kids role model, and if he is, you missed out on the first class of Parenting 101.

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